I began this blog during the summer of my first year of medical school, it seems appropriate to end it now – the summer following my final year.
2 weeks ago I graduated and in under 2 weeks I will begin pacing the wards as a junior doctor.
I still cannot quite believe it, even my husband laughed at the idea when I first mentioned that I wanted to be a doctor – to be fair to him I was holding our 6 month old and covered in baby sick at the time! –
Anyway, here I am.
No longer can I hide behind the “I’m just a medical student, let me get the doctor for you”. I can’t get a friendly junior to do the cannula for me and I can’t decide to go for lunch when I like.
I know that the next year and especially the next few weeks are going to be unimaginably tough. I will probably regret having chosen medicine, shout at my kids more than they deserve, cry at my husband and moan to my other FY1 friends daily. But I will also try to remember the days before I applied for medical school when I used to sit in hospital cafés, reading a book, dreaming of working there. My joy at learning new medical facts, the satisfaction of taking blood when a patient says “I didn’t feel a thing”, the pride of working for the NHS.
I have found myself in a privileged position where strangers will share parts of their lives with me and I promise to do my best for each and every one.
Thanks for listening along the way, it’s been fun.